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Thursday, June 22nd, 2006
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7:27 pm
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Today I bought a Ceasar salad for lunch. Imagine my surprise on seeing that, according to the sell-by date, it should have been consumed by the "Ides of March".
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| Tuesday, December 13th, 2005
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10:36 pm
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So, on Sunday Hemel Hempstead suffered "a tad" of fire at a large oil depot. Three observations, as a local resident:
1) Tobacco companies are suffering massive downturns in their quarterly profits. This is because the entire teenage chav collective has de-camped to the Buncefield depot area, where they are desperately inhaling the air instead.
2) Evacuated residents were offered temporary accomodation in a local 'leisure park'. Faced with the risk of (a) further explosions and the accompanying devastating fires, (b) choking on potentially toxic fumes, and (c) the risk of the building collapsing on top of you due to whatever structural damage it has sustained; VERSUS being evacuated to fucking Leisure World.... being burnt/choked/crushed to death sounds like a positively pleasant experience.
3) Why the Industrial Estate? It was the only vaguely decent bit of Hemel. Couldn't the fires have devestated the new "Riverside" shopping mall (the "river" in question being little more than a trickle of ant's piss through a pathetic bile-infested binge bollocks of a muddy stream channel), or the aforementioned Leisure World?
Fuckssakes Total (UK), this wasn't planned well was it?! A further observation - I managed to use a semi-colon above in the correct grammatical context. Bonus.
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| Monday, October 24th, 2005
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10:34 pm
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I was having a quick flick through my livejournal the other day, when I realised that it was, essentially, shit. So I deleted everything, and now I'm going to start again. Indignant rage-filled messages should be directed my way as normal.
In other news I'm working on a new website - www.gabooch.co.uk. There's still loads of work to do, and nothing actually viewable on there at present, but there will be before too long. I'm going to stick some fishkeeping related stuff on there soon.
When I can think of something funny to write about, i'll be back.
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